Queen’s University...published new research on the emotional bonds between mothers and adolescent daughters. The study examined how well mother-daughter pairs were able to manage rapid transitions between emotional states and the so-called “emotional rollercoaster” of adolescence.
As expected, pairs with low flexibility...reported lower relationship quality and higher levels of maternal symptoms. Those who showed moderate levels of flexibility showed higher relationship quality and lower maternal symptoms...those with the highest degree of flexibility showed no associations with relationship quality or symptoms – suggesting that a moderate degree of flexibility is optimal for a strong and healthy relationship.
In addition, the study found that the degree of flexibility demonstrated was consistently related to the mothers’ depression and anxiety symptoms, though not with the symptoms reported by their daughters...
“The adolescent developmental period is an important transition for parents and adolescents alike,” says Dr. Lougheed. “Generally speaking, parents and teens who are able to ‘go with the flow’ of new emotional experiences in their relationship will likely be show better well-being in other ways as well.”
Because of all this, and so much more ... I resolve to stay the course set out by our courageous foremothers who fought pointedly, persistently for equality. I'm a woman raising a daughter in a world that values her more for her bone structure than her brain. This is my resolution. This is my feminist manifesto.
I now know there are steps I can take to change how I think, to find the true me again. That is why I am going to take better care of myself this year. In fact, that’s the only resolution I care to make. For both my own health, and as an important example to my kids, this year, I'm resolving to practice a kindness that starts from within.