As all new parents know, the main problem with babies is that they sleep too darn much.
They snooze through the night when you want to stay up playing. They doze off every two hours for naps that last the whole morning or afternoon. In short, babies leave new parents with far too much time on their hands. Happily, there are many ways that you can wake up your over-sleeping babies safely and easily.
Here are 17 simple actions that will rouse them every time:
1 | Try to lay down and take a desperately-needed nap.
2 | Unroll your yoga mat for the first time in 9 months.
3 | Take off your clothes, run the shower, and put one leg in.
4 | Sit down to work on your still only 20-page novel.
5 | Attempt intimacy of any kind with your partner.
6 | Turn on “Game of Thrones” and let the episode reach the character you actually care about.7 | Begin to meditate.
8 | Begin to poop.
9 | Call your health insurance about a particularly confounding labor and delivery bill, wait 35 minutes, then finally get a human being on the phone.
10 | Cry softly to yourself.
11 | Start to clean the oven with poisonous chemicals.
12 | Start to scrub the toilet with poisonous chemicals.
13 | Get wrist-deep in soiled cat box litter.
14 | Begin the dishes for the first time in, literally, a week.
15 | Sigh inaudibly as you sink into a comfortable chair.
16 | Almost remember something important that you’d forgotten.
17 | Quietly type a blog post.
Any of these actions are 100 percent guaranteed to wake any slumbering infant, no matter how peacefully asleep that child may appear. And – take it from this mom – you always want to wake a sleeping baby.
It takes a village!
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