12 Important Life Secrets Not Revealed in the Panama Papers

by ParentCo. April 04, 2016

1 || Where your freaking car keys are. (Check the fridge.) 2 || Where your left your damn phone. (Check the bed.) 3 || The value of your offshore account. Because it's zero. Because you don't have one. 4 || What sort of terrible trauma drove Hootie & The Blowfish into country music. 5 || Why minivans have built-in, state-of-the-art movie theaters, but you still can't get one with a privacy screen fully separating you from your numb-nuts kids at the touch of a button. 6 || That, in an unexpected plot twist, Putin is actually a philanthropist/helluva guy who generously paid off all your debts AND bought you a lifetime supply of excellent health care coverage. 7 || How it's possible that Carrot Top has more fame and money than you ever will. (But how, though?) 8 || Why any of us ever tolerated Caillou. Like, even for one single second. 9 || Why texting and driving is illegal, but it's still legal to drive and tweeze your billy-goat chin hairs. 10 || Who, in fact, let the dogs out. 11 || Where you hid that copy of Are You There God? It's Me Margaret you stole in 7th grade. 12 || Why the name of this scandal doesn't end in -gate, like a proper scandal should. WHY ISN'T CALLED PANAMA PAPERS-GATE? WHY?! Pssst. Here's a taste of the 11.5 million secret files that have been revealed: Panama Papers


ParentCo.

Author



Also in Conversations

Creative Ways to Teach Children About Water Safety
Creative Ways to Teach Children About Water Safety

by Charlie Fletcher

When you teach water safety skills, you can add sustainable water practices, so your kids can learn to be careful around the water while taking care of the planet.

Continue Reading

How to Know if Your Child is Ready for Potty Training
How to Know if Your Child is Ready for Potty Training

by Allison Jandu

What many may not realize is that readiness for potty training isn't just about age—it's more about your child's individual development. Here's how to know.

Continue Reading

girl holding her hands together who is expressing love
5 Tips to Teach Kids the Subtle Art of Graciousness

by ParentCo.

In an effort to improve both manners and self-esteem, here are five easy tips to practice when accepting a compliment. You'll help raise a gracious kid.

Continue Reading