Aries May 2016 Horoscope

by ParentCo. April 29, 2016

If the zodiac was a construction site, you’d be the bulldozer. You’re getting from point A to point B, obstacles be damned.

Overall, it’s a great quality, if a little jacked on adrenaline. You might have to take a step back from all that when Junior’s trying to tie his shoes, and you’ve got zero patience for the bunny-around-the-tree nonsense. JUST LEARN TO TIE YOUR SHOES ALREADY, KID. Here’s some good news: the planets are chilling out for you right now, so you can relax too. Mid-May will be a good time to kick back with someone whose company you enjoy. Maybe it’s your children — hey, they’re pretty cool. Maybe it’s your bae and you’re gonna get lucky! Who knows? Be open to all of it. Mid-month, you’ll be a bit of a money magnet. The sun and her pals are set to crash your solar second house wearing a whole lotta earthy Taurus — not unlike when The Weeknd at his place in Malibu. Try to remember relaxation and boredom are not the same thing. You can cool out, and still be productive. Don’t believe me? Your toddler’s been rolling around on the floor, eating Cheerios, AND digging in his left nostril for the last 8 minutes. Take a page from his book.

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